Trigger warning: mention of suicide, depression
Malinaw pa sa alaala ni Nadine Lustre ang matinding dagok na pinagdaanan niya nang sumakabilang buhay ang nakababata niyang kapatid na si Isaiah Lustre.
Noong October 7, 2017, natagpuang wala nang buhay si Isaiah sa loob ng kuwarto nito sa bahay nila sa Quezon City.
Siya ay 16 years old lamang noon.
Pinaghihinalaang nagbaril sa sarili Isaiah dahil sa dalawang magkasunod na putok ng baril ang narinig ng dalawa nitong nakababatang kapatid noong gabi ng kanyang pagpanaw.
Read: Nadine Lustre finally opens up about brother's suicide, depression
Ang pagkamatay ni Isaiah ang isa sa itinuturing ngayong pinaka-challenging experience ni Nadine, lalo pa't noong mga panahong iyon ay kasagsagan ng kanyang karera sa showbiz.
Sa panayam niya sa One Down nitong Miyerkules, April 3, 2024, muling binalikan ng aktres ang dagok na ito at kung paano niya ito hinarap.
Tanong sa kanya ng host na si Tessa Albea, "Has there been anything in your life that really challenge you, where you had to pick things up, just go, or you know, something that you haven't talked about?"
Mabilis na sagot ni Nadine, "The most challenging one I’ve gone through was when my brother passed away.
"My brother was going through all of these challenges in his mental health as well.
"I was still doing a variety show every day, so can you imagine?"
Habang nagluluksa, pinipilit daw noon ni Nadine na magtrabaho at humarap sa kamera na parang walang siyang dinaramdam at pinagdaraanan.
Pagbabalik-tanaw niya, "I was grieving at the time, but on TV, I had to smile and interact with people like nothing happened.
"That was really hard."
Read: Nadine Lustre willing to settle dispute with Viva out of court
Binalak daw niya noong panandaliang magpahinga para makapagluksa ngunit hindi raw siya pinayagan ng kanyang talent management.
Pinayuhan daw siya ng kinabibilangan niyang management na magpatuloy lang siya sa pagtatrabaho at makakalimutan din niya ang lungkot at sakit na nararamdaman niya noon.
Ayon sa aktres, dito niya nakita at napatunayan kung gaano ka-"out of touch" ang mga Pilipino pagdating sa usapin ng mental health.
Saad ni Nadine, "At some point, when I felt I was already crumbling, I’d ask for a break.
"How they responded was like, 'Just keep working. You’re gonna forget about it.’
"And I'm, like... It just goes to show how uneducated and out of touch we are when it comes to mental health issues."
Read: Nadine Lustre begins own healing by letting go
Hanggang ngayon, hindi pa rin daw makapaniwala si Nadine na napagdaanan, kinaya, at nalagpasan niya ito.
Saad niya, "Still to this day, like, every time I think about that time, I still don’t know how I was able to get out of that.
"It’s kind of, like, autopilot. You had to pull through because it’s a responsibility.
"As much as you want to take a break and breathe from it, you can’t really do anything especially if you’re under contract.
"You have to honor that."
Read: Nadine Lustre reflects on showbiz life: "We don’t have everything.”
Para sa mga nangangailangan ng kausap at tulong dahil sa kanilang mental health issues, tumawag lamang sa National Center for Mental Health Crisis Hotline: 1553, Landline (02) 7-989-8727 at cellphone number 0966-351-4518.