Lian Paz says there is no shortcut when it comes to how she and partner John Cabahug instill discipline in their kids.
It takes setting boundaries, knowing how to correct the kids when they make mistakes, and explaining the reason behind the correction.
Lian and John have a daughter named Nina, who is now nine years old.
The couple are also proud parents to Xonia and Xalene, Lian’s daughters from her previous marriage to estranged husband Paolo Contis; and Maria Alexandra, John's daughter from his previous relationship.
Read: Lian Paz details how Paolo Contis reached out to visit kids
Speaking about raising the kids, Lian tells PEP.ph (Philippine Entertainment Portal): "Kami naman kasi ni John, hindi kami parehas ng personality.
"Ako yung police, e, so ako yung istrikta talaga. So pagka ako nagdisiplina sa mga bata, siya yung gagawa ng paraan.
"Later kakausapin niya, ilalabas niya sa labas. Parang sa kanya, easy na lang, parang light talking na lang. Ipapaintindi niya sa mga bata bakit ako nagalit."
Lian emphasizes the importance of making sure the kids understand when she corrects their behavior.
"For example, 'I need to get your phone.' They know why. Hindi puwedeng hindi nila alam.
"It really helps talaga when they are growing, lalo na ngayong teenager na sila, with ethical values talaga.
"Kasi kapag ako lang as a human being, I will always falter talaga. Init ng ulo and everything. Minsan wala sa lugar.
"At iba kapag na-practice mo talaga yung pasensya and how to deal with them nang maayos."
Lian believes their loving relationship with the girls is rooted in the quality time she and John consistently spend with them.
"Sobrang importante talaga ng quality time, lalo na ngayon na sobrang into gadgets lahat.
"So kami, we see to it, sabi ko sa kanila, 'Pag nasa sasakyan, nasa car, nagda-drive si dad, walang magse-cellphone.
"Kasi minsan ganoon, di ba? Magse-cellphone sila. So they have no time to wonder, na yung mga brain nila ganyan.
"Tapos sa bahay naman, kapag kumakain sa dining table, ayoko din na may gadgets.
"So as much as I can, I would like them to refrain from using gadgets na sobrang tagal na oras. So kumbaga, binabawasan ko lang yung time nila doon.
"Like, for example, nasa car, minsan yun na lang yung time niya together. We see to it that we ask them, 'What happened in school? How was your day?' So pati sa dining table, ganoon."
PEP interviewed Lian via phone call on Friday, August 8, 2025. She is currently based in Mandaue, Cebu, which is the hometown of her partner John.
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LIAN PAZ ON TEACHING KIDS AGENCY AND FREEDOM
Now that Xonia and Xalene are teenagers, Lian tells PEP that she and John want them to have a sense of agency and freedom—even in simple things.
For example, when the girls celebrated their birthdays, they were given the freedom to choose how they wanted to spend the day.
Xonia opted for a dinner out with her best friends, while Xalene chose a day at the beach with Lian and John.
Lian elaborated: "Ayun, ganoon kami ni John, actually. Kasi nagpo-focus kami sa kung ano yung gusto ng mga bata, and makaka-build ba iyan ng personality nila.
"Kasi minsan, di ba, we're into thinking about throwing parties all the time. Pero minsan, gusto lang natin yun as parents to socialize, e. Pero hindi naman pala yun ang gusto ng mga bata.
"So kami, parang feeling ko, yun ang dapat ituro natin sa mga bata para may freedom sila to choose.
"Mahirap kasi, tayo lumaki tayo ng ganyan, wala tayong karapatan pumili di ba? Pag gusto ng magulang dapat mag-debut ka, magde-debut ka talaga. Ay, naku, dyuskulord!
"Gusto namin, meron sila talagang decision-making din."
Lian underlines that parental guidance is really a must when teaching kids how to make wise choices.
"Yung decision-making nila, iga-guide namin yun. For example, yung decision nila ngayon, makikita namin ganoon pala sila mag-decide.
"At least makikita namin ni John paano kami e-enter. Paano namin sila mako-correct?
Paano namin sila makakausap about it?
"It's because own thinking nila yun. Kumbaga, hindi kami yung nag-decide."
Read: Former EB Babe Lian Paz details love story with Cebuano partner, how he accepted her kids
ON FAITH AND HAVING A SPIRITUAL COMMUNITY
As parents, Lian knows that she and John are far from perfect.
Their faith and connection to a spiritual family have played a key role in helping them build a strong, resilient household despite the challenges.
"Kasi actually, hindi naman ako naniniwala sa ganyan before. I take things very lightly when it comes to the Bible.
"Pero nung na-learn ko siya, nung na-get into it ko talaga, nakita ko talaga na kung yung mga kumpanya nga, yung mga eskuwelahan may mga handbook.
"Dito pala, yung Bible ang handbook natin dito sa earth. Nandito na pala lahat.
Nakalagay na pala lahat."
Lian continues: "When you search on Google, like, how to deal with anxiety, Bible verse about it, ganyan. Lalabas talaga, ang dami.
"So sabi ko, grabe, we're missing out on this. Para sa akin, ito yung perfect na ituro natin sa mga anak natin.
"Kasi kung tayo lang talaga yung magde-decide, ang daming mali talaga. Kasi tayo, lumaki din tayo, hindi din tayo aware."
Lian adds that it's also a tall order for her and John to practice what they preach to their kids.
"It's different kapag yung may spiritual family. Iba yung mga activities na ginagawa niyo together.
"Minsan, wala yung technology. We will put that away and do this and that lang. So meron kami mga limitations.
"So kahit ano pa yung faith namin, kung pinapakita naman namin sa mga bata nagko-contradict dun sa faith namin, hindi din sila maniniwala."